Dark Thoughts

Well, I've finally managed to find a few minutes while being here in Turkey.

Everything going full steam ahead, and there are sooooo many tasks to do. The small army of Australians on site here, is keeping the slightly larger army of Turks working at full tilt. One of the directors has bet another of the directors some money that this thing will be running by September 28, and we're the ones that have to try to make it happen. Personally I think he's lost his bet, because there's still a few things that we're waiting on before we will be ready to go, but we won't be far off that start time.

I had a chat via Yahoo with Jodie today. She was really angry with me because I hadn't been in contact with her for a while. This was very frustrating for me, because I'd been trying to ring her for days and never being able to get through. My email is playing up such that I can't send reply's or new emails, which is a frustrating issue in itself not conducive to civil conversation. I think it's really hard for her at the moment. On her part there's an awful lot of risk in relocating to be close to me, and the schedule of work and tasks that she's set herself is pretty brutal. I wish that somehow I could put her mind at ease, but changing other peoples opinions and feelings is impossible. I can change my attitude, but I accepted a long time ago is that you can't change other people, only how you view them.

I'm really looking forward to being closer to her, and these periods of being away from her are difficult. Turkey's not too bad because I have some friends here that I've known for a while, but it would be better if Jodie was here also. Mongolia though seemed quite desolate being there alone. Perhaps it was because the stay was so short and I had no communication whatsoever with the outside world. At least I'll have a work colleague with me on the next trip there, and hopefully I'll have mobile coverage there next time.

Anyway we kind of got a few things off our chests this morning, which I think is good. I'm going to try to ring her again tonight once this madhouse here at work settles down for a Sunday evening, and keep my fingers crossed that nothing goes "Kaput". I've just received my task list for next week. It's pretty extensive, but do-able I think. Lot's of big jobs that I knew were coming up, that I've been making preparations for, so it shouldn't be too hard to get them finished, as long as all the equipment keeps running, and the parts that we've ordered actually arrive.

I really miss hearing her voice, even through the delays and bad lines and stuff. I still know that it's her on the other end of the line, and for those moments we are connected through the thread of fibre and microwaves that encases this world. It's like our hearts stretch out across the oceans in a thread to be together.